Monday, October 27, 2008

Please Smoosh Your Boobies

Squished boobies are no fun! But then neither is Breast Cancer.
Annual mammograms, combined with breast self-examination, and regular breast examination by an experienced health care professional, (such as Doctor Shoal,) increases the chance of detecting cancer early...which decreases your risk of dying from the disease by 25 - 30% or more.
Now, on the other hand....
Smooshed Boobies are VERY FUN!
...and are a creative way to help promote Breast Cancer Awareness
Please visit Smoosh Your Boobies! for more information...
(oh yes, those are mine)

THANK YOU DOCTAH SHOAL
FOR SUPPORTING SMOOSHED BOOBIES...
AND INVENTING THE ELECTRO GAMMIO TEST BRA!

Friday, October 24, 2008

No More Scrawny Necks!

(Original advertisement found at Modern Mechanix)
The average human head measures about 22 inches in circumference and weighs about 12 pounds...but Doctor Shoal sports a gigantic 48 incher,
so you just KNOW that thing's gotta weigh a LOT!
As a result carrying around such an enormous head, the Doctah has pretty much written the book on developing one's neck muscles...and it is available for purchase for only 25 cents (in coin)...so get yours today and Doctor Shoal will throw in a complimentary dance lesson absolutely free!

You Asked For It...

Oh dear gawd....Doctah Shoal!!!
Do something!!!!

Thursday, October 23, 2008

What A Wenis!

Poor Doctor Shoal....he's been working so hard lately... look what's happened to his wenis!

Better rub some creme on that thing Doctah...it's pretty dang gross.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Wordless Beaver Wednesday

As per Doctah's orders
(...which are getting stranger 'n stanger!!!)

Monday, October 20, 2008

(Not so) Wordless Bra Tuesday on Monday

And the ever thoughtful Doctah Shoal is providing FREE breast exams
at the downtown Hollydale Food Mart every day from 8am-5pm!
(And at night, by appointment only.)
Bring a sweater, it gets chilly in produce section

Saturday, October 18, 2008

He's Not Just A Golfer Dude Arugula Doctah!

Whoda' thunk that the handsome Doctah Shoal is also a world renowned expert on greens?! And I'm not talking about the kind you find on a golf course either! (Although he sure knows his stuff about those too.)

The other day, in between corn dog deliveries and dealing with pesky beavers, the multi-talented Doctah took a little break to fill me in on the virtues of greens such as arugula, escarole, and even endive! Then, much to my surprise, he whipped up a little Shoal Seazer Salad with his Special Yogurt-Gravy dressing. Believe me...it was to die for!

And...
he even did the dishes! *sigh*

Think you know your greens?.....Well then, name these!




First person to answer correctly gets an autographed copy of Doctor Shoal's soon to be published cookbook:
GREENS ~
They Aren't Just For Putting Anymore!
(Or, You Say Arugula...I Say Escarole!)

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Monday, October 13, 2008

How To Tame A Pesky Beaver

Mellom baby mais hunder og norsk bevers,
dette stedet Hollydale General Hospital blir en dyrehage!

Jeg bare h├ąper at dette tames de pesky bevers!

(need translation? click da pic!)

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Will Wonders Never Cease At Hollydale General Hospital?!

For some strange reason,
Hollydale General Hospital
is experiencing a great big boom of baby corn dogs!
They are very cute, but kinda messy....
So, Doctah?!?....please send more mustard and napkins!
STAT!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Chicken Breasts Gone BAD....

Poor Doctah Shoal...
Looks like his love for chicken
and his interest in breast implants
got kinda mixed up!
I think he might want to keep his "experimentation"
limited to cremes and ointments...
don't you?

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Monday, October 6, 2008

Got Goiter?

Doctor Shoals sure has been having an unfortunate streak of bad luck lately....what with his P.O.A. and Rashy Azz (not to mention the fact that his little foray into the world of Magical Cremes seems to have taken up gobs of his free time)...NOW the poor man is suffering from a golf-ball sized goiter!

This is simply NOT unacceptable because, professionally speaking,
it is really really gross,
PLUS Doctor Shoal's handsome face deserves a handsome neck!
So I took it upon myself to do little research and whaddya know!
I discovered an easy cure!
Ya just need MORE SALT on your chicken wings, Doctah!
click to biggify
Now, who's your favorite nurse?!

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Doctor Shoal's CURE FOR UNSIGHTLY AZZ

Click to biggify
(Original advertisement found at Modern Mechanix)

If you suffer from THIS...and all the recommended creams and ointments are just not working for you, then try Dr. Shoal's newest invention,
the Hollydale Pose Breefs!

The special elasticized nylon fabric is impregnated with a steroid cream (nomorecrackbutt) to help soothe your rashy azz and minimize your, er, discomfort.
And if nothing else, at least your unsightly azz will be covered UP!

Personally endorsed and worn by Doctor Shoal!

Order yours today and you'll receive the free brochure
"How Come My Butt Itches?" absolutely FREE!

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Shazam! A Man's Cream For A Man's Face!

Following hot on the heels of his amazing
Dr. Shoal proudly presents
SHAZAM! - A Man's Cream For A Man's Face!
Click to biggify
(Original advertisement found at Modern Mechanix)

Dr. Shoal's unusual interest in creams and ointments has not only gotten him into some sticky situations, but also led to this remarkable discovery which when applied daily will "invigorate and harden your facial muscles and promote an alert, forceful expression!"
Just like Doctor Shoal!
Guaranteed
or your dollar back!
And if you order now - Dr. Shoal will throw in a complimentary
Halloweenie Card - free of charge!

(Thanks Doctah!)